In an idyllic world we would be able to live our lives without facing judgement from society but unfortunately, that is not the case. You see, most people do not even realize that they are making false perceptions of a person and their situation by making judgments and I guess we are all guilty of it in some way or another.
It is not until recently that I have realized that I face judgments in many aspects of my life... I have had it all. The main one that annoys the hell out of me (besides the awful mental health judgments, which I am getting onto) is 'When are you going to get a proper job?' I am signed off work on health grounds, I work part time in a pub and I am constantly searching for volunteering vacancies around my area to give a bit back. I feel that society judges me for being a nearly 20 year old who doesn't go to uni or hold a full time job but I am a work in progress, I am not ready to set out into the professional world yet. I have battled with Mental Health Issues for the majority of my life and I have faced so many judgments from people and society as a whole. I have a none exhaustive list of things that people have said to me that have made me question why I even confide in others. There is still such a huge stigma around Mental Health in society that needs to be addressed as it causes more damage than it is worth. 'I feel that people are actually cruel when I tell them about it. I get the "I don't see why you don't like your body. You look fine. You're just being stupid" type of things. No-one understands that even though they think I look ok, I not not feel okay and it is hard to tell anyone because then I'm just being that over dramatic girl who just wants to be skinny when I'm actually trying to get someone to listen to me' - AL - Severe Body Dysmorphia The most common judgments that I face with my mental health is that people think I am aggressive, angry and mean all of the time when in reality, I can be the happiest and most loving person in the world (at times.) Another one that really gets to me is that I feel that people think I am incapable of most things, I get mollycoddled and it really does not help me try to grow in regards to my independence. 'I always feel like people assume I am dramatic. When I say I have BPD it's like they instantly back away and don't take me seriously anymore' - JS - Borderline Personality Disorder I feel that the media has a huge part to play in societies judgments of mental health as they only ever portray the dark side of it such as murders. The modern day society seems to believe everything media outlets tell them and half of the time they have it so wrong but I will not get into that, This blog post will turn into my usual confusing ways of communicating - Talking about 60 different things before realising I have completely gone off track. 'My most common judgement is that I am not sick enough to ask for special accommodations (Note taker, Extra time for exams etc.) and that it is odd that I succeed in my studies (My mental illnesses should be a setback) and the biggest one is why I get upset when people use the term "Are you bipolar?" to talk about PMSing' - CSA - Bipolar Affective Disorder I feel that the first step towards eradicating the stigma and judgments around mental health is to educate the world about what it is really like. Educating people that it is not just fixed by going on a walk or keeping yourself busy. Educating people that it is not a way of mind but in fact it is an actual chemical imbalance in your head. Educating people that if you work towards breaking that stigma then it would allow girls, boys, men and women to speak up about their pain. 'I constantly get looked at like I am a fragile China Doll... I have found that since I have gone through depression people think I am incapable of making my own decisions and it feels like people are always waiting for me to break. The most common judgement I get is "You can't do that because of your mental health" But I again think that that falls under the fact that they think I am a china doll' - LC - Depression I hope that one day, I will bring a child into this world knowing that if they wanted to speak up about their feelings then they will face no judgement and get the help they need because after all, mental health is just as important as physical health. I would like to thank the lovely ladies who have shared their stories with me.
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